Episode 31: The Time Is Now

Can you feel it? There is an explosive collective awakening that is resonating with millions of people all over the world right now. It’s a perfect storm of people  from all walks of life and backgrounds realizing simultaneously that “something” is not working for them anymore and it cannot continue. All those comfortable distractions that used to satisfy their uneasiness and quell it for days at a time, aren’t touching it now. This energy has its own heartbeat. And it is driving so many people into unchartered territories to finally take the reins of their life and gallop into the unknown. But there is also a lot of trepidation and confusion that comes with this intense awakening. There’s a common theme of “How do I do my life moving forward?” “What is required of me at this powerful juncture in my life?” Whether you are finally ready and willing to face a health issue and put every ounce of your intention into it, or whether you are contemplating leaving a job, a marriage, a city or town or more, because you simply cannot continue with the life you’ve been living any longer, the same pulsating vibration follows everyone. On today’s show, I’ll offer my perspective on this monumental time in our collective history, share how it’s affecting my own life and offer multiple perspectives, directions and tools for setting yourself up for success, no matter what personal goals you are striving to put into action.

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Transcript

            Welcome to Episode 31. Today’s topic is: “The Time Is Now.”

            I plan out these episodes weeks in advance and I had another show I was planning on doing today. But about two weeks ago, that changed. The reason it changed is I started having conversations with people, some casual, some serious, and the identical theme continually came up in each conversation. I didn’t prompt the theme that was coming up. The conversations all naturally gravitated to the same center. And that theme was a buildup within each person I talked to that had reached its apex and as it overflowed, the energy it created and maintained was that of a pressing and raw demand that came from within each of these individuals who had vastly different backgrounds, educations, religion. And that demand was experienced and articulated as: “I have to make serious changes because I’m not doing this anymore.” And while some of that reflected health changes, for others it had to do with their job, their marriage, their children, their parents, their church, where they lived and more. And within each of those areas I heard the same declarations. 

This isn’t working any longer.

I can’t continue this pattern.

I’m done and I mean it. 

I can’t destroy myself any longer. 

I finally see it now. If I don’t make significant changes in my life, I’m dead. 

This job, this lifestyle, this relationship, this whatever is killing me. 

I will not do this one more day. 

Where once these same declarations may have been threatened, there was always a slight resistance or tenor that held a lack of motivation. But not now. That unmotivated tenor is completely gone. The fence sitting is done. For many of them, they have been asked to make these changes for years if not decades and they may have attempted it in the past but done so in a half-ass manner with none of the pressing energy that is now being felt. I know people who have disregarded their health and who are now facing the consequences of those actions. For some of them, now it really is “do or die.”

People who are experiencing this strong energy right now, are not questioning whether they really mean what they are saying. No. They are making plans, either in their head or actually doing it or they are firmly entrenched already in that new reality, and they are not looking back. Now I understand people deciding that they have to make changes or else is not an original concept. Obviously, many people over the years have realized they have to go to rehab, lose weight, get their health in order, leave a relationship, quit a job, move to an entirely different location, possibly significantly alter their lifestyle because of multiple reasons and more. But the energy I’m talking about right now is not a handful of people. There is an explosive collective personal awakening, like a perfect storm of the collective realizing simultaneously that “something” is not working for them anymore and it cannot continue. That the comfortable distractions that used to satisfy their uneasiness and quell it for days at a time, aren’t touching it now. The metaphorical whiskey ain’t workin’ anymore. Maybe they thought they knew what they wanted and now they don’t have a clue. Maybe what they have believed for years or their entire life is a lie. Not a misappropriation of the truth. A lie. And they lived their life based on that lie. And they suffered because of that lie. what they thought it was and at the same time, recognizing in those quiet moments as they’re driving their car, or taking the subway or the train or the plane or just sitting in front of the television zoning out and feeling this palpable realization that is so acute, so precise that is telling them “the time is now. Do it.” Whatever it is. Do it. Take the plunge. Be afraid and still do whatever it is you are compelled to do. It’s okay to be afraid. It means you still a heartbeat and a pulse. But don’t let that stop you. If you only realized it, you’re not alone. There are millions of people out there right now who are engaging in the same conversations with themselves. The same ‘what ifs?’ The same feelings of being lost and knowing that while they don’t know yet what it is they are trying to find, they have to step on that path and begin their search and their personal journey. Whatever the hell that journey may be. 

This energy I’m talking about has got its own heartbeat. It's a zeitgeist energy. And it is driving so many people right now and some people are still trying to navigate what they are feeling inside. It's “how do I do this life?” How do I do my life moving forward? So many people feel like they’re breaking into such uncharted territories and there’s no map or anyone who can really understand what you’re feeling because most of the time you don’t know what you’re feeling. And this theme song of “how do I do my life from now on?” is felt on different levels that involve different situations or circumstances. But they all share the common thread of both a palpable urgency and a drive to reconstruct or deconstruct their life as they’ve always lived and known it. 

There are people listening to this show right now who are nodding their head and saying, “I can feel it.” Even if they don’t feel like they are that intuitive, they can feel it. We are collectively in that shift energy where people are saying to themselves or those they love, “I’ve got to get my life together. I have to make a plan.” And even if you are well past the healing stage and you’ve done a lot of work, you are also saying the same thing. They don’t know what they know, but they just know. And they are ready to throw everything to the wind and upend their life and potentially the lives of those who they love. So today’s show is dedicated to all those people. And I hope I can humbly offer ideas, directions, potentials, thoughts, experiences and more that creates maybe just a little more clarity. A little more understanding perhaps, from what I’ve personally been through and what has worked for me and many others. Because the conversations I was having with these people who inspired today’s episode, were conversations where I felt an unexpected kinship between myself and another who was reflecting back to me the same questions I’m asking myself as well as making the same changes in their life that I am actively making. And I’ll mention a couple of them as they come up.  At the least, I hope this show makes you realize that you are not alone if this energy is bubbling up and overflowing inside of you. That if what I’m talking about on today’s show resonates with you, and you say “how does she know what I’m going through?” it’s because you are not alone in how you are feeling and taking in your life and recognizing that whatever patterns you have lived with and agreed to and created for yourself can and must bereshaped, in some cases eliminated and in and other cases incorporating compromises that serve you as well as the others in your life who may not yet be feeling this pinnacle moment in time but most likely, will be. 

So you have this energy. Now what? You have to channel it in directions that help to create the change and reduce the likelihood of creating chaos. Because this type of energy can create its own engine that fuels the progress without a lot of effort or fatigue. Because it charges you up and puts you into that river that flows into whatever or whatever or whoever you are supposed to experience. But that same energy can be disruptive and erratic and even manic at times and blow up your life where maybe that wasn’t necessary. Sometimes it is. I get it. But sometimes you don’t have to burn everything down. You can dismantle it without creating additional trauma for yourself and others. 

First off. Courage. You must have courage. I don’t care how scared you are. You gotta dig deep. And so grab a pointy shovel and start digging. That overflowing energy you feel will fuel your need for courage. It will often make courage easier to attain because it’s like suddenly your requirement for change is greater than your lack of courage and so you just do it. And sometimes you forget to be afraid because you are that intent on your mission which is to restructure your life in a way that creates possibly more balance, more simplicity, deepens connection possibly, expands your awareness, creates an opportunity for an experience that your soul is crying out for. So many possibilities. The courage is not about throwing caution to the wind as much as moving forward with planning, purpose and a vision of where it is you need to be. Not want to be. NEED. Whatever you are being called to is like a hunger that must be fed and satiated. 

Get out a piece of paper and draw a line down the center. On the left side, write out as best you can what it is you want to change or transform in your life right now. What is that energy that you are unable to ignore calling you to do? On the right side of the paper, make a list of what you think it will take to bring that into the physical reality. What sacrifices may need to be happen? What energy drains in your life need to stop now in order to have more time to create whatever your desire is? What aspects of your personality will you need to give up to make this happen? How will your schedule need to shift? Who is the best person to perhaps consult on your desire? Does this desire need to be unpacked a little more so that you can get a better idea of what you are about to jump into? How is this desire going to impact people you either live with or have a close relationship with? Those are just a sample of questions to consider. And they are not meant to dissuade you from what you want. They are meant to take your desire from a place of hibernation and into the light so you can see it from all angles and adjust what needs to be adjusted or removed from your life so you can actualize this thing you want. 

What this list is doing is forcing you to create a container that will hold whatever it is you are feeling pulled toward. Whether it’s leaving a relationship or a job, or starting a small business from home, or packing everything up and moving to a locale that is appealing to you or any number of goals, you need to find the container that will become the engine that drives this desire. The container can be a structure to a point, but be careful with creating too many structures because that can lead to an inflexible mentality and that just creates more tension and that builds resentment. I bring that up because I’ve made that mistake. A container holds what needs to be held and it rejects or discards what no longer resonates with your energetic vibe or the energy you are wanting to attain. And here’s the thing: don’t overfill the container. Keep it simple. Let’s say your goal is to overcome adrenal fatigue because you’ve reached a point where life is passing you by and you want to be part of it again. I can dig it. Been there. OK. So first, you have to know that the longer you’ve had adrenal fatigue, the longer it will take to heal it. So be reasonable with your expectations. I’ve had adrenal fatigue three times in my life and the third time was of course the worst and I was told by two doctors that if I allowed myself to get to that point again, I’d never have any quality of life worth living. So I began to work with a functional medical doctor, I got on targeted supplements that gradually nourished my kidneys and adrenals, I allowed myself to sleep sometimes twelve hours at night, I also worked on regulating my cortisol, which is the stress hormone and so much more. But within all this, I had to also eliminate a lot of bad habits, patterns and toxic belief systems that were either contributing to my adrenal fatigue or preventing me from really healing it. I did what I had to do and it took me four solid years and a lot of lifestyle changes before I was able to get what was considered a healthy cortisol reading. And then I had to maintain that healthy level. And that meant maintaining all the intrinsic patterns that I had woven into my life to that point so that I would never go back to that broken state of being. That meant saying “No” to a lot to people who wanted to over obligate me and “Yes” to those who genuinely had methods that would help me. 

To that leads me right into the next and vitally important step. And that is stop wasting your precious time. Because it is SO precious. Have you noticed how fast a day goes by? I can remember when a day used to drag. Not anymore. I’ve talked to twelve-year-olds who say things like, “I can’t believe it’s already September!” I’m thinking, “What?” Time dragged for me like a lead bowling ball when I was twelve. But here we are. Stop wasting your time. Get rid of the distractions. I didn’t think I spent that much time mindlessly engaged online. And I don’t mean paying bills, or in my case, doing research for a show or actively promoting my show. I’m talking just mindless scrolling where at the end of the day, you can’t really remember what you took in because it all blended together. So I started keeping a pad by my phone and computer and wrote down how long I spent scrolling or just mindlessly online. And after three days of keeping tabs, during a 14-hour period, I averaged nearly five hours of mindless scrolling. Five hours! And I bet there’s people who could beat that number. And it’s not about creating more time for productivity!  No, no, no. See one of my goals was to have more dedicated time to meditate, reflect, read a book for pleasure not work, that was a novel concept, no pun intended. My goals were all about creating the time I never felt I had or could steal from the time that was necessary to get important things done that had to get accomplished.  I never thought I had time read a book for pleasure. Well, apparently, I did have time. I had almost five hours of it!  Seriously, get off your screens as much as you can. Remember, the word “device” has the word “vice” in it. Stop the click bait. You know the algorithm. You know the pattern. Don’t click. Same with rage bait. That’s like shooting yourself in the head and wondering why you’re in so much pain. Stop the doom scrolling. Stop reading and forwarding apocalypse porn. That need has been there before but since 2020, it’s got its own territory and zip code. You do realize that 95% of what you read and worried about and forwarded to your list, never ended up happening. But in your mind when you read it, you were convinced that this time was the time to be even more jacked up. What pointless stress did you put on your tender nervous system for something that never happened? And the other 5% of the apocalyptic terror you shared with others? The fallout was never as vital or serious or critical as you allowed yourself to believe. I’ve known so many people who tell me how deeply depressed they are and how for the first time in their lives they’re on antidepressants. And I tell them straight up, get off the doomsday rhetoric and see if your depression goes away? And they look at me as if I’m crazy but I’m not the one with the nervous tic and taking anti-depressants. Get away from the darkness and the doom. It will change the quality of your life. It will deepen your ability to experience your life and your world. When you get off the internet and brevity becomes your superpower when it comes to replying to emails and texts, you will start to see things you’ve been missing or ignoring because your head has been pointed at a tiny box that is wasting your time and destroying your quality of life. And all that blue light that emits from your screen is destroying your eyesight and your sleep cycle. Sure you can get Blue Block glasses or turn on the dimmer on your computer but that’s not the answer. Because it’s not about how can I spend more time online and not have this issue affect me? It’s how can I stop wasting my time online and use that time to dive into life or whatever goals you’re striving for. Keep your texts and emails pithy and to the point. I used to write ridiculously long emails. Not anymore. Unless it’s a very complicated situation that has to be spelled out, they are short. 

            Other time wasters: If you have been seeing a therapist or healer or shaman or whatever and you are not moving an inch and possibly going backward, stop going to them. Find someone else. Or find nobody. Start using whatever you’ve learned and apply it. If you’ve been seeing someone professionally and after six months you are no better off, get out of there. That therapy or therapist is not working for you. I went to a structural therapist a few years ago who I realized, fifteen minutes into the session, was not a compatible fit for me. I gave it another twenty minutes or so to make sure I wasn’t jumping to conclusions  and then ended the session. I paid her and I left and lesson learned. 

Same thing applies to wasting your time in a group or organization. If you are not getting anything from it except stress, worry, anxiety or a sense of futility, leave. Don’t prop up bad establishments or groups that are not feeding and sustaining you. See where you’re being starved and get out and find what feeds you. Too many people are staying in groups and with therapists that aren’t doing a damn thing for them. 

I want to stress that it’s not about taking control of your life. It’s about taking ownership of this currency called “time” and how wisely and intentionally you are spending that time. That’s a huge difference. Control has this unintended consequence of creating walls, guilt, resistance, tension, resentment and stress. Taking ownership of your time feels like you are in charge because you are in charge. And you are doing it for YOU. You are saying ‘no’ to what is not working any longer and ‘yes’ to what will bring you more satisfaction, more inner peace, more contentment and I hope, more joy. And honestly, I hear it all the time. I want more satisfaction, more inner peace, more contentment, MORE JOY. I was always droning on about that. Now you have the tools to make that happen. Stop wasting your time. 

And on that same theme, get away from as many people as you can who drain your energy. I read a very interesting article a while ago on energy vampires – those are people who use your energy to fuel themselves and leave you completely spent. And there was this great quote in there from a guy who said, “from now on, everyone only gets my overflow.” And the context was if he’s running on empty or fumes, he’s not going to give you that precious energy. He’s going to do whatever he has to do to build himself back up to overflow and then give that overflow to others. Now I understand that that is not always possible, especially for women who are mothers or caregivers of the sick or disabled or have no choice but to work long hours and feel exhausted all the time. But do whatever you can if you are in a situation like that to recharge your internal battery. And that might mean saying “no” to a weekend invite when you really need to take it easy and rest your body. Remember, I’m the one who dealt with severe adrenal exhaustion three times in my life. I know what burning that candle on both ends does to a body and mind long term. And I can honestly tell you that the more I gave, the more I was expected to continue to give, regardless of how it was affecting my mental and physical health. Even when I said, “I need some time off,” I was emotionally manipulated to maintain the level of whatever I was doing for them. Until 2016 when I became so ill, I could not get out of bed. And even then, demands were still being made on me. And that’s when I began to see crystal clear what type of value I held in some people’s eyes. And it did not go unnoticed, and one hundred percent of those people are no longer in my life. Because I got to the point where it was me or them. And I chose me. 

So once you stop wasting your time and you have more time to do meaningful things, create new habits and patterns. Doesn’t have to cost much or anything. Play with your animals. Not eyeing your phone and throwing the ball. Like being right there with your pet. Start walking. Plant and take care of a garden. Wake up and spend twenty minutes watching the sunrise instead of blasting your face and eyes with the blue light from your screen. Give yourself the true gift of bathing your face in the sunrise glow that carries the beneficial, healing infrared light. I’ve probably had five people tell me over the course of the last year or so that they watch the sun rise every morning and how important it is and I listened and I read about it and I couldn’t disagree but I’ve never been a morning person. But now I am. I’ve been doing this and as someone who used to go to bed as late as 3am when I was writing books, greeting the sunrise was never on my to-do list unless I had to get up to catch a plane. But I started doing this and what’s weird is that when I made that decision, I didn’t have to set an alarm. It’s like the desire to do it woke me up and that was before the light streamed into the bedroom. So I had to change a big pattern. Not just get up at 6:30 so I could take in the first light and then the sun cresting over the far ridge, but I had to completely revamp my nightly routine and that meant getting into bed by no later than 10:30 but preferably 10pm because I require eight hours of sleep and I won’t sacrifice that. My pattern used to be get ready for bed around eleven and then eventually get into bed and go to sleep at 1am or later. I stopped that and I made these changes all at once. Not incrementally. That is how important this felt to me. And getting to bed and going to sleep no later than 10:30pm is a good thing for your body, your health, and your mental wellbeing. There’s a saying, “An hour of sleep before midnight is worth two after," and that's because we have an internal clock or what is called circadian rhythm. This is built into us and it sends signals to our brain that it's time for sleep once the sun goes down. Don’t ramp it up. Dial it down at sunset. My big concern was how will I be tired enough to want to go to sleep at 10 or 10:30pm? It never was an issue! It took maybe three days and my internal clock did all the heavy lifting for me. Especially because I was also ramping my day down around 7pm. How was I able to do that? Because I stopped all the energy draining distractions during my day. Remember the nearly five hours of mindlessness I told you about? And I haven’t once wanted or needed a nap during the day. However, I did need the occasional nap during the day when I was getting to bed sometimes as late as 2am. 

I want to emphasize that it’s not just getting up before the sun comes up. It’s positioning yourself outside or inside to watch the sun actually rise. Because that light has many healing benefits, besides the fact that it’s a beautiful and often magical thing to watch every morning. I haven’t seen one yet that is identical to the others I’ve watched. There’s always something a little different. That sunrise carries the infrared light spectrum that will penetrate your eye and reset your circadian rhythm while also regenerating everything from your skin, to boosting serotonin, to increasing alertness and so much more. I also discovered that infrared light exposure in the morning prepares and protects your skin from damaging UV rays that peak around noon. There’s a practice called sun gazing and I encourage you explore it. You have to work up to it but that morning sun as it’s just creeping above the horizon can be gazed at for five seconds and then look away. You don’t have to close your eyes. Then work up to a few more seconds each sunrise as the sun is just coming up. I’ll put a link in today’s show notes on Sun Gazing and more about how to do it and the precautions. I can attest that since I have been dedicated to getting up and watching the sun rise, I have felt a palpable shift that I’m still trying to understand. It’s wonderful but I can’t articulate it yet. I just feel different. I feel more focused and less scattered. My nervous system seems to be responding better and with less or no reactivity to things that would usually make me slightly impatient or irritated. It’s so hard to explain. I’m still trying to work this out. But I’m fascinated to see where this is going for me and how this new habit will positively alter other parts of my life and where that will take me. Also, there are various Circadian Rhythm apps that you can download on your phone and offer customized features that will help you dial in your location and how to balance your circadian rhythm.

So these are lifestyle changes. But what else needs to get addressed because the time is now? Simplifying your life is top five of my list and on the list of most people who I talked to who were engaging in massive changes. That’s a huge subject that I could probably do an entire show about. But looking around and seeing what can be thrown out, given away, donated, sold, is massively important right now. The burden of ‘stuff’ is a weight that doesn’t serve you. I’m as guilty as anyone of loving something so much that let’s buy a couple cases so we don’t run out and then two or three years later finding it and seeing that it’s expired and having to toss it and realizing how much I’d love that money back. Been there and done that too many times. And I had to train myself to not repeat that pattern and I have done that. But I’ve also done a massive overall on closets and cupboards and you name it and thrown a tremendous amount of old stuff out and not missed one item I tossed. Living in a center of chaos is not conducive to healing or clarity of thought. If you’ve ever studied Feng Shui which is the Chinese method for designing your environment with the focus on balance and energetic flow, you know what I’m talking about. So if you have doorways blocked or partially blocked with bags of stuff or dirty clothes, in Feng Shui you are creating a stagnation that is not just an eyesore but an destructive energetic on your physical and mental well-being. I can’t get into the whole story right now but years ago, I did consciously incorporate some key Feng Shui tips where I used to live and the results of how my life began to flow again was too coincidental. Certainly one of the main principles in Feng Shui is getting rid of clutter. Because old stuff carries old stuck energy. Even if your house is spotless but the bureau always has been over there and the pictures on the wall haven’t changed in twenty years, move things around. See what happens!

Next up is quit the circular thinking patterns. If you are always saying “I’m waiting for the right time,” and you’ve been saying that for years or you just keep focusing daily on the same thing and no action is taken, take action. Even if it doesn’t work out, at least you broke your pattern and made an effort. And honestly with the people who are feeling this enormous energetic shift lately, even the circular thinkers are forcing themselves into uncomfortable arenas because they feel like it’s now or never. And as I’ve said many times, you’re going to be uncomfortable. That is a given when it comes to transformational growth. Be comfortable in your discomfort is my best advice. 

The other important change is to keep your plans private. I’ve said it before and I’ll repeat it. Don’t overshare! Don’t blast it on social media. Be careful who you talk about your plans to. Obviously, this is a theme that myself and others understand because I see it mentioned all the time. Diluting the energy of your plans, even with people who you can trust and who have your back, opens you up to ridicule and second guessing. And some people are stone cold jealous of you having plans that have the potential for you to outshine them. You’re not trying to outshine them but that’s how they interpret it and those people can and will sabotage your intentions. Not everyone has your best interest at heart. You may have a great opportunity in another state but you may have a family who doesn’t want you to leave because they love you and they’ll miss you and that’s all valid. But they might also come up with a lot of baseless fears and warnings that have no bearing. 

Stop believing that everything in your life requires the same level of attention. This is one that I had to really take to heart about seven years ago because I suffered from the belief that everything carried the same level of importance, and I imbued everything with the same level of focus, agitation, nervous energy and value and that was a big mistake on my part. I don’t do that anymore. There is very little in my life right now that carries that intense of a charge. Maybe because I burned it up so hard for so many years and forgot that not everything requires the same level of attention or concern. “Everything” is not important. Some things yes but not everything. If everything is important or vital, nothing is important or vital. If everything is a ten on a scale of one to ten, nothing is a ten. This rampant distortion of the value or significance of something, actually leads to a dilution, if you will, of the experience because you are putting so much energy into the “importance” of whatever it is that you miss the little moments or the opportunities to reflect or evaluate whatever it is. And I can tell you that doing this sucks the joy out of every single experience. And you also risk ostracizing those around you who either find this attitude impossible to be around because of the unnecessary tension it creates or because they don’t see the need or care that something is done with such excessive and often belligerent energy on your part. It creates division when unity is what you want. I speak from experience.

This behavior can be born from perfectionism and not necessarily because YOU are a perfectionist but because YOU were expected to attain levels of perfection to please another. Usually a parent or someone you didn’t want to disappoint or be rejected by. I understand that very well. Rejection is killer to a child or teenager. They feel rejection on such a deep hard level that they do whatever they can to meet the expectations of others and meet them every single time. And that’s impossible. So it sets you up for failure. And that turns into a snake eating its tail. In reality, this mental attitude is the fallout of a dysregulated nervous system. And I can say without question that once I began to get my nervous system healthy, I was simultaneously able to put into proportion each event, problem, disagreement, plan of action and more and treat each one with a dialed down response that wasn’t the sky is falling! In all honesty, this behavior is a trauma response. And I get that in spades. But when you consciously begin to heal your trauma, you also heal your nervous system and then these over reactions to everything being vital calms down. You see things and people and events for what they are and you don’t inject drama or fervor where none needs to be injected. 

There is a thread that winds through this issue that is perfectionism. And I certainly fell into that trap as a child and on through my adult years. I read once that perfectionism is the fear of being criticized. That any imperfection could potentially lead to rejection and social disapproval. But once you heal that part of you that believes this lie – and it IS a lie – that manic need to attain a level of perfection just to please someone else dissolves completely. I know. And I think if people who knew me twenty or thirty or more years ago met me now, they’d be shocked at how blasé I am about most things. The things I care about deeply, I care about. But I still don’t become overly emotional and create meaning that is not necessarily there.

Another one to seriously look at. Stop watching dark, dystopian, disturbing entertainment. That’s NOT entertainment. That’s destructive programming that’s on par with the apocalyptic porn I mentioned earlier. Frankly, I’m blown away by the amount of dark and often demonic films and series that critics may applaud and give five-star reviews. But I’ve got a twenty-minute rule and if I’m not into the story or it’s just too miserable or flat out gratuitous with violence by the twenty-minute mark, I turn it off. I’m not wasting my time and filling my mind with this crap that doesn’t lift me up or enlighten me. I remember when they used to write great comedies or romantic comedies or stories that were uplifting and not syrupy or cringeworthy uplifting or were basically written for children. The good stuff they used to produce were great escapes and gave you a break from life for an hour or two. Really pay attention to what you are mentally ingesting from your media choices. If you are really into this dark shit, take a month off from it and spend it doing something else and see how you feel after that one-month period.

I’ve said this one before and even dedicated part of a past show to it and that’s expect more from yourself. And not in a way that you’re beating yourself up. But more in a way of lifting yourself up. Maybe talk to yourself. Give yourself a pep talk. “I can get through this.” “I can figure this out.” Never give up. You don’t know just how close you may be to solving or resolving your problem. 

Set up a lot of boundaries. It’s going to be hard if you’ve never built solid boundaries but do it! You can’t heal if you don’t have boundaries. You won’t have the time or the focus if you are constantly having to surrender to someone else or something else that is taking advantage of you and your good nature. Practice looking in the mirror and saying “No.” And mean it. 

Do something you don’t want to do every single day or something you’ve been putting off. And do it with purpose and no anger or resentment. It’s not easy sometimes but get in that habit. There’s a lot of things I don’t want to do and I used to do them with a lot of bitching and moaning. I don’t do that anymore. I just do it. Get it done and move on.

And the last one I wrote down is become more curious. Develop curiosity because when you do this, the curiosity overshadows your fear about whatever it is.  That’s why I say that curiosity is what moves you forward when you start to heal. Curiosity overrides fear. You can feel the fear, but the curiosity dominates. So it’s, “Yes, I’m afraid of what’s around that corner but I’m more curious than afraid and I’m going to check it out.” That’s the vibe. And what I’ve noticed is that once you do the hard work and you heal, when the unknown comes up in your future healed life, it’s not experienced as terrifying. It’s experienced as just another adventure you’re curious to take. 

You know the saying is it takes twenty-one days to change a habit, but real-world studies were done to test this and the average is actually sixty-six days before that habit become automatic and integrated into your life in a seamless flow. I haven’t come close to sixty-six consecutive days of watching the sun rise every morning. But I’m well on my way. And I’ve got a lot more changes to instigate and add to what I envision as a reworking and regeneration of how I live my life and spend my time. I intend to ride the wave of this collective energy that is knocking at the door of so many of us all over the world. I hope this show has given you some ideas and pointers that help you align with whatever it is you want to see reimagined in your life. Do it. The time is now!

That’s all for this week. Thank you for choosing to listen to this show. Share this podcast with others and follow me. Check out the notes for this episode where you’ll see the links to find me on Instagram and X @laureldewey or thealchemyofnaturalhealing. On the show notes, I’ve included the companies I support and have helped me in my healing process, so check that out and look for the coupon codes. Looking forward to you joining me next week when I open the mailbag and answer your questions. New episodes drop every Saturday. Until then, remember that “Awareness is a demanding mistress. Once she wakes you up, she won’t let you go back to sleep.”